amends

i know that in a relationship or in a friendship i shouldnt always have to feel like making amends or always saying sorry is necessary.

what person came up with the idea that "love is never having to say sorry?"

because i believe that that is absolutely ridiculous.

sometimes making a relationship work means a simple apology. or it means a simple acknowledgement of his or her existence.

its hard for me to see people that i love exit my life entirely, especially if there are things i know i have done wrong.

tonight i was sitting outside with my neighbor, enjoying the summertime talking about the idea of a failed or diminished relationship.

between our conversation he had recieved a text that someone, seemingly depressed, had sent him in an effort to make things right and to hopefully make herself feel better.

and i love the idea of someone being interested in others enough to do things like that.

relapse.

i want to go buy an american spirit tobacco pouch and read and sit on my balcony and think.

i really love people for their opinions.
i like that people have opinions, whether the same or different as mine, and dont care whether i agree or not.
i can truly respect a person for standing up for the way he or she feels.

it may sometimes be difficult to think about a person not being on my side, but it happens.
this week i waswatching cnn report on a story of an eight year old girl who was brutally raped by three (maybe four) boys significantly older than her.
since she came from a middle-eastern family they felt strongly about purity and virginity and maintaining good reputations.
once the incident happened, the parents werent as upset with the boys, but with the victim herself.
she was literally shunned for dirtying their familys reputation once she was considered "tainted" and no longer innocent.

it seems terrible to us, to think that she wasnt comforted after she was raped, but their culture is worlds different than ours.
obviously, we think that their ideas of what is unacceptable are ridiculous.
we dont like thinking about an eight year old girl that has had to deal with the pain of being taken advantage of in addition to her familys punishment.

but essentially, its hard to fight with them.
as the people said on cnn, its one of the most difficult situations.
theyre opinions are different.
who are we to say that they are wrong and we are right?
who am i to say that a differing opinion is wrong and mine is right?

"perhaps even these things, one day, will be pleasing to remember"